S3PosterHere we are. I can’t believe it. The greatly anticipated premiere of the third season of my favorite show, The 100. I really can’t relate to you how excited I was for this premiere. And In general, I was pleased that it largely lived up to my anticipation. Incidentally, my alternate title for this post was, “The One Where Clarke Bangs a Lady,” but I decided to keep it classy. More on the significance of that below.

With this new season, we get a new opener, this time with Bellamy talking. This touch is presumably, once again, to get new folks on board with the premise of the show. Bellamy mentions that they are “searching for other survivors from the Ark.” It hadn’t occurred to me until I read about this element of the story in an interview, but we can’t assume that only the Chancellor’s section of the Ark survived the crash landing. Other sections might have made it too. It will be interesting to see how they fared, if we ever get to. There is So. Much. happening already this season, I almost don’t know where to begin.  Also, this post will be longer than some. Apologies in advance.

The episode proper starts with a quick backtrack, mainly focusing on Clarke leaving Camp Jaha at the end of Season 2 because she can’t face the guilt of having basically committed genocide at the mountain to keep more of her people from getting killed. Oh yeah and whatever that nonsense with Jaha and ALIE or whatever that was that he was babbling on about all last season.

S3E1murphyOur first new scene of S3 features Murphy in the fancy bunker he found himself in at the end of Season 2. He has really ugly dreadlocks and looks like the classic crazy, drunk gutterpunk. He can’t break out of the containment door of the bunker and continues watching the video further, the one from the end of last season where “Chris” kills himself. I had really asked myself back then how the couch and the rest of the bunker were so pristine and not full of a 97-year-old skeleton. It turns out we didn’t see that part of the video yet. Some others come in to cart him off talking about how “the radiation’s coming,”

Murphy keeps trying to break out of the bunker. Video keeps replaying. It’s 2051, and Rebecca, a real person, meets ALIE an AI she created. ALIE’s core command is to “make life better” by fixing the root problem. Oh great. Here we go, the stock sci-fi scenario of the computer that fulfills its programming all too well. The root problem? You guessed it, “too many people.” So ALIE triggered the end of civilization.

Murphy has been there 86 days and talks to a video camera. He contemplates killing himself with the gun Chris used, but then suddenly the containment door is released. Murphy gets out and follows a drone (Note: drones are corny and so last year) to the big fancy house where Jaha found ALIE in S2. And then here’s Jaha, being all creepily benevolent, with the crazy-eyed look and vehemence of the newly converted. He has clearly drunk the ALIE Koolaid. “I found it, John. The City of Light is real.” Pro-tip: When people say, “I found it” with that look on their face, back away slowly.

I will state for the record that I do not like this story arc. I do not like where it might take us. I worry for all our friends on the ground now that there is a free roaming AI avatar that caused the end of civilization. How many people are “too many?” And is the City of Light just the Matrix, and she wants to make everyone slaves of the Matrix – you know, like in The Matrix? If so, I’m gonna be annoyed.

Oh yeah, and the new credit sequence features Polis, among a few other locations we haven’t yet encountered in the show yet. I’ll probably take a closer look at that sometime soon.

We join Bellamy and Lincoln, shirtless and fighting. We soon realize they’re in a gym of some sort, so this is a training scenario and not something about Octavia. Because them fighting about her would be a dumb, sexist trope. Instead, Lincoln is instructing other Arker folks in hand-to-hand combat, which is a really good idea. We see some old friends like Harper and Monroe, who aren’t dead. Yay! Also, Monroe looks really gay, as always. Maybe I haven’t mentioned this before, but to me, Monroe has the appearance of a classic baby dyke. I want her to have a crush on Harper. Someone, please write that adorable fanfic, okay? I’d read it.

Anyway, so Bellamy gives Lincoln a Guard uniform jacket. We get the sense that Lincoln has some reservations about wearing an Arker uniform, probably for lots of reasons like him being Trikru, but not least because Octavia would probably object. Bellamy tells him that the jacket represents cooperation between Grounders and the Sky People, and “My sister will understand that eventually.” Will she?

It turns out that the Commander has a kill order out on Lincoln, so he can’t come on patrols. He stays at the Ark in an adviser type position, like their Grounder consultant. That sucks a lot that she has a kill order out on her friend, but we all know about Lexa’s duty and having to carry out justice according to her people’s laws. Treason is a very killable offense, so she has no choice, really.

Kane says they’ve detected a beacon signal in Sector 7 at the border of the sketchiest allies in the truce, aka the Ice Nation. I’m afraid we’ll be hearing a lot from them soon, and it probably won’t be good. He gives Bellamy permission to arm the crew going on patrol, but he warns Bellamy not to go off and shoot anybody so as to keep the tenuous peace that has been established since the Mountain.

Kane and Abby talk about Clarke and the fact the she’s still missing. Kane wants to send another search party, but Abby declines, realizing they won’t be able to find her “until she’s ready to be found.” Kane’s main dude comes in and talks about them receiving “three clicks” on the secure channel. “She wants to meet.” She who? The Commander? Will we get to see Heda? Where’s Lexa? Where?

S3E1JasperBellamy collects his adventure squad in what looks like kind of a cantina. Monty is ready, but Jasper passed out drunk on the floor reveling in his manpain. Monty: “Maya’s death broke him.” They drag his drunk ass up to come with them and brace him against a truck.

Minor rant: Okay, so I realize everyone deals with grief differently, and everybody is traumatized by and/or grieving from the events that they’ve experienced in recent months: getting sent down to an uncertain fate, having to learn to live on the ground and fend for themselves, lots of death, the culling, the grounder attack on the dropship, and the horrors of the Mountain. I get it. This is some terrible stuff. But come on, Jasper. So many people have lost so much more than you. I know I’m not supposed to judge people’s grief, and yes she died tragically in his arms. But…. sorry. I just think he could cut down on the drama just a little.

Bellamy smooches Gina, who seems to be his new bae and also in charge of groups bringing back supplies from the Mountain. She very sweetly gives Bellamy a copy of The Iliad that she picked up for him, noting that Bellamy’s mom had read it to him and Octavia when they were kids. This is a very sweet scene, shows her thoughtfulness, and I highly approve of this relationship. However, I’m sure there’s some significance to The Iliad being the book of choice, and I’m not going to go into it right now, but let’s just say there’s probably some kind of foreshadowing going on here, and I’m not sure I like the way it’s pointing.

The adventure squad gears up. Raven slides out from under a large ballistic type truck, ready to go. Yay, it’s Raven! We all love Raven and here I would like to express the hope that 2016 is the year when this show stops piling the hurt on poor Raven. She has suffered enough, okay? Meanwhile, Monty splashes water on Jasper, and amazingly in this one moment Jasper demonstrates that he is going to be a total dick to everyone this season. He does this by giving Bellamy a sarcastic salute and simultaneously flicking water into his face. They get into the rover, which I guess means we’ve got automobiles now. Gina gives Bellamy the sweetest goodbye. I would like to reiterate how much I fully endorse this pairing. They would have beautiful wavy-haired children.

The rover scene has set a new standard for “happy-go-lucky teen moment” on this show that will probably never happen again, so let’s just enjoy it, shall we. Well okay Jasper isn’t so happy-go-lucky. He still blames Monty in part for Maya’s death by irradiation.

But oh yeah, Octavia accompanies them. On a freaking horse. Go Octavia! Stay our tough little badass Grounder girl!

On the way out of camp, they pass some cute kids with soccer ball. Kids being normal kids. This is the promise of life at the camp formerly known as Jaha. Now it is called “Arkadia,” as we see on a sign above the gate. It harks back to “Arcadia” which was both a region of ancient Greece and means “any real or imaginary place offering peace and simplicity.” I hope it offers that, but this is The 100, so who knows for how long? Also I’m now wondering if Arcadia features in The Iliad anywhere. Will have to look that one up.

The Rover Road Trip plays like half a music video for “Add it up” by the Violent Femmes, that time-honored anthem of teen rebellion and sexual frustration, to this day still mildly scandalous in its liberal use of the word “fuck.” Watching this scene, I asked myself how they were going to get around that, but also really wanting to see our gang sing along and yell “fuck” really loudly, because they would definitely do that. But unfortunately, clever editing took care of that potential FCC violation. Included in the squad are Miller, Monty, Jasper, Bellamy, Raven, and Octavia on the horse.

Oh, and in the part of the song where it goes “I just wanna make love to you,” does Miller hit on Monty? Please tell me he did. It was pretty adorable. Even if he’s not hitting on him, this moment once again shows us that this world does not place any special significance on anyone’s sexual orientation. It’s just a thing that is. No one cares. Your guy friend can pseudo-flirt with you, and even if you aren’t into dudes, it’s all in good fun between friends. People say The 100 is dark, but part of its vision for the future of humanity isn’t too bad. I could really deal with people not making a thing out of people’s sexuality.

Also, Raven is smiling. I like happy Raven. This may be the happiest scene of the season. Even angsty-pants Jasper bursts out the moon roof of the rover going “woooo!” But then any more potential profanity in the song cuts short when they suddenly get a signal from the beacon. A tracking beacon the Farm Station section of the Ark. It’s in Sector 8, aka Ice Nation territory. Also, underscoring my take on this world’s approach to sexuality, we learn two things from Bellamy here: 1)  Monty is from Farm Station, and 2) so is Miller’s BOYFRIEND. So btdubs, this character we’ve known since Season 1 also happens to be gay and has a boyfriend who’s possibly still alive. Very casual, The 100. This is one of the many reasons I love this freaking show.

Oh hell. We’re at ALIE’s lair again, just when I had hoped we wouldn’t get any more of this nonsense for now. On the plus side,  Murphy is suddenly cleaner than he has ever been on the entire show. An apple and some water sit on the table next to him when he wakes up. This is probably highly symbolic. He’s gonna eat of the fruit of the tree of ALIE and gain some kind of forbidden knowledge. Murphy is skeptical for now, though. Jaha replies, “Let us explain.” Yes, he refers to himself and ALIE as “us.” Koolaid status: fully consumed.

Murphy responds to Jaha: “And here I thought I was the one losing my mind.” I’ve never agreed with Murphy ever before on this entire show, but now I do. Get out, Murphy! Get out of there! Jaha acknowledges that ALIE is responsible for dropping the bombs, but, “She didn’t destroy the world. She saved it.” Make that gallons of Koolaid.

Back with our friends approaching the Ice Nation, aka Azgeda, we learn that the territory stretches for 1000 miles to the north, so presumably it’s the western half of (or all of?) current-day Canada. We also know that the truce after the mountain includes some specific rules of engagement, such as the use of “nonlethal force.” But they have weapons and have said “screw protocol” when they decided to go into Azgeda territory, so clearly shit is about to hit the fan.

Sure enough, with guns drawn, they are approached by some Ice Nation warriors. I really appreciate that Octavia is full of super important Grounder information, such as the fact that white war paint = ice nation. Also, respect to Octavia for speaking hella good Trigedasleng, the language of the Grounders. It’s kinda hot. Okay fine, really hot.

Jasper continues being a douche and goes up to casually yank the beacon device off the Azgeda warrior, which in terms of this show, is pretty much the stupidest thing you could ever do. Like ever. Understandably, Azgeda dude grabs Jasper and holds a knife to his throat. But being very mentally unhealthy at the moment, Japsper laughs about it. The guy gets pissed about getting laughed at and starts to slit J’s throat. They have to respond with force and end up killing all three Azgedakru warriors. Incidentally, in true Grounder fashion, Octavia uses her sword and throws it like a champ. Raven has to ride an Azgeda horse on the way back. I forget why.

P.S. Jasper is basically the reason relations with Grounders go to hell. Remember when he shot at Anya’s people during the fateful meeting at the bridge in Season 1? Yeah. Me too. I’m really losing my sympathy for Jasper.

Bellamy and Monty in the rover go to meet Kane and Indra at a tunnel. Bellamy’s all like “sorry we had to totally break the truce back there and kill those dudes who a part of the least stable clan in our very tenuous truce,” but Kane blows him off because, “This is about Clarke.” Indra informs us that “She’s being hunted. By everyone.”

Cut to a panther approaching a helpless, tied-up bunny. I have real anxiety for this bunny. Kill a bunch of Ice Nation dudes, and I don’t blink. But a bunny? A bunny? The stakes just got a lot higher. Someone is up in a tree with a dagger, jumping down onto the panther. What? It’s Clarke with dreads and red hair. Naturally, she battles the panther and wins. But got scratched. After killing the panther, she lays hands on it and says the the Grounder blessing to send it on its next journey, “Yu gonplei ste odon” (Your fight is over.)

S3E1WanhedaOkay, so this is a very different Clarke. She has dyed her hair, presumably due to being hunted. Probably the dye was made of like tree bark, or berries. Or the blood of her foes. She looks the most badass we have ever seen her. She fights panthers with her bare hands. And she speaks Trigedasleng. Don’t mind me. I’ll just be over here fanning myself.

Next we get Clarke watching a building from behind trees. A man leaves, and Clarke hauls in her panther. We find out it’s a trading post, and Clarke seems to be a semi-regular customer. Clarke is also speaking some really damn fluent Trigedasleng with blonde shop lady. We see that the young woman is wearing an old Ark armband a la Season 1. She offers our gal a drink, but Clarke is in a hurry (“as always”).

The adventure squad brings in Jasper so he can be treated for his near-lethal neck wound. Lincoln is now wearing his Guard jacket. Octavia gives him a sarcastic, “Nice jacket” (in Grounder). Meanwhile, Raven can’t get off the horse because her leg is bothering her so much. Abby helps her.

Back in the rover, we join Kane, Indra, and Bellamy, with Monty driving. We find out that there’s a bounty on Clarke’s head. Indra, ever full of important information of this sort, tells us why: “She’s a symbol. She’s known as Wanheda, the Commander of Death.” So apparently it’s a Grounder belief that you absorb the power of everyone you kill. People want to kill Clarke to gain her power, especially the Ice Nation’s queen. This whole thing has weakened the Commander’s hold over the coalition of the twelve clans. Not cool.

Back to Clarke and shop lady: Clarke asks about the bracelet, even grabbing the girl’s hand in a semi-aggressive manner, but she drops it when a dude comes in, turning around looking at some Grounder goods all innocent-like. He’s clearly creepy and has also stripey shit smeared on his face and shows a drawing that looks vaguely like Clarke, but only vaguely because it’s a pretty shitty drawing. He asks if she’s seen Wanheda. Our gal lies, saying that Clarke was there two days before, and that she’s heading towards the Ice Nation. On his way out, he makes eye contact with Clarke, who tries to duck her head and pull the old, “Nope, nothing to see here” routine. It’s not terribly convincing.

Turns out trading post girl has known it’s Clarke all along. She offers the Commander of Death that drink again while she waits for the guy to clear out. You know, like you do when the Commander of Death is in your shop. You cordially offer her a drink. Yeah. So we find out the young woman’s mother was taken by the Mountain, and Clarke ended the reaping. That’s why she helped Clarke. Clarke looks startled to know that anything good came from the killing she perpetrated at the Mountain.

Back at Arkadia, Abby wants to go to the Mountain for medical supplies, but Lincoln says it will break the truce if they look like they’re colonizing Mt. Weather. Jasper leaves medical prematurely in a douche-like manner. Meanwhile, Jackson wants Abby back in medical because, “We have 12 patients waiting, including four contraceptive implant removals.” Contraceptive implants! Of course. That’s how they enforced the one child rule on the Ark. But I guess now it’s time to repopulate. Since they have achieved post-Mountain quasi-peace, the Arkers can focus on more important pursuits, like gettin’ busy, y’all! If the Ark is rockin’, don’t come knockin’.

Abby approaches Raven again about her health situation. She knows Raven is still in a lot of pain, but Raven responds, “It’s nothing I can’t handle.” And then she goes off on Abby, “If you weren’t so busy being chancellor and doctor to avoid your own pain, you’d realize you suck at both.” Burn.

At the trading post, things are starting to get a little sexy. Niylah cleans Clarke’s wounds, which seems to be some sort of Grounder foreplay. Clarke appears to revel in the gentle touch of her hands, probably having not had any real human contact in months. She appears to relax for a moment, until Niylah notes that Clarke has no kill marks, to which Clarke responds, “My back’s not big enough” and gets a pained look on her face. When Niylah goes on to ask Clarke about what happened at the Mountain, Clarke responds quietly: “I did what I had to do.” She presses Clarke to say more, but Clarke isn’t interested in talking about it.

S3E1ClarkeNiylahIn fact she’s not interested in talking at all. “Niylah, would you mind not talking?” Now the most badass seduction line ever, which none of us will probably ever be able to get away with using. It’s questionable when Clarke does it, because Niylah looks sad for a moment and backs off. But then like a boss, Clarke just grabs Niylah’s hand, pulls it towards her boob, and looks soulfully into the young woman’s eyes. Seduction Level: unlocked. Get it, Clarke!!!

And then Clarke just goes for it. She grabs her and kisses her. With tongue. Then they’re on the bed. Clarke’s shirt: shucked. They make out rather steamily. Then Niylah flips them, pulls her own shirt off, and then immediately with zero prelude goes downtown on Clarke. Nice.

Now to the significance of this scene, both for Clarke and for the series as a whole: First of all, I get why she would want to find a little solace. She’s tortured by what she did at the Mountain, she can’t return home and face her guilt, and any moment of respite is probably a welcome relief. Niylah is happy to do this for Clarke because she’s grateful for the defeat of Mount Weather. Who would not be inclined to offer her a little momentary happiness under those circumstances? Our girl Niylah is clearly kind, and Clarke is… well, Clarke, aka Wanheda, aka the Commander of Death. So yeah, clearly they both have reason to pursue this little dalliance. Which it probably is. And yes, I’m still fully pro-Clexa.

In the series as a whole, this scene establishes one thing firmly: Clarke is indeed bisexual. She had a boyfriend in Season 1, but whatever she had with Lexa in Season 2 was not a one-off fluke. Not only is she capable of attraction to women, but this clearly ain’t even her first visit to V-town. You do not jump on a gal with that level of confidence if this is your first same-sex experience. So in conclusion: Clarke is no stranger to the ladies. Suck it, homophobic fans who questioned the validity of the Clexa kiss last season!

Also, this sequence marks a real departure from most network TV treatment of any kind of queer love scenes. Usually, there are either no sex scenes (I mean, just try to name one on a network show that is not by Shonda Rimes), or more often than not, the relationships stay cute and chaste, and therefore not realistic or in any way hot. Or if there is a scene, they keep it way too non-explicit. There’s never any real implication of what activity might be occurring, no passionate kissing, no suggestion of nudity. Yet you always get these details in hetero sex scenes, which happen like 24/7 in pretty much every series. But networks very much shy away from a realistic depiction of gay or lesbian scenes – and yeah, it’s just discrimination, let’s call it like it is – so given that reality, this was a bold move on the part of The 100. Serious kudos for being real and not treating it any different than any other similar scene. Though admittedly it’s a little shorter than, say, the Lincoln/Octavia scene in S1, but I’m not gonna quibble. We got a lady-centric love scene that was pretty legit. I’m not cryin’.

At the edges of Arkadia while Octavia tends her horse, she and Lincoln have it out over the jacket in a combination of English and Trigedasleng. O doesn’t want to be an Arker. She just doesn’t feel at home there but can’t go back to the Trikru after she was disowned by Indra. Instead, she wants Lincoln to run away with her to Luna and the Boat People clan, but apparently that’s not possible in the current political climate. Lincoln points to O’s heart, “Trikru is in here. Nothing can take that away from us.” But Ocatavia counters, “That uniform does.” Ouch. Trouble in paradise.

I can really see how Octavia’s conflicted feelings make sense, though. She was never a real part of Ark culture, having to hide the fact that she was an illegal second child. She feared the Guard more than anything, 1) because they barged into her family’s quarters on patrol looking for her throughout her first 16 years, and 2) one of the Guards used his position to have sex with her mother in exchange for keeping his mouth shut. So basically rape. In short, she hates the Guard. Lincoln, up to this point, had been a huge part of her connection to the Grounder culture that had, for a time, embraced her and gave her a sense of true belonging. It is clear why his wearing that uniform would cause her to feel differently about him. Up to this point Lincoln and Octavia have been kind of the only happy, or at least stable couple on the show. Bummer. Please fix things soon, kids.

Do we have to do the Jaha storyline some more? Really? Whatever… So Jaha, and some mutant dude named Gideon are leaving to go somewhere or other, and they want Murphy to come with. Apparently ALIE “Converted a nuclear warhead to a power source” so she can “complete the work she began with her creator 100 years ago.” Shit. And once again, I can’t believe I’m even saying this, but I agree with Murphy: “How is it possible that you sound even crazier than before?” Jaha, in true cult-member fashion, responds, “You won’t understand until you experience it yourself.” Then he gives Murphy a pill? A microchip? Murphy refuses, but Jaha sticks it in his pocket for later. Is this some kind of drug dealer scenario where the first dose is free, but you have to pay for more?

Also can we talk about the fact that it’s a pill? This could not be more Through the Looking Glass The Matrix if it tried. I really. Really. REALLY don’t want this to be some stupid alternate reality cliche. Please let them not go that already-trodden sci-fi road. Unless they can do something truly original with it, which I doubt. But I’ll try to keep an open mind.

So anyway, Jaha and Mutant dude go to get on the boat. And then it turns out that Emori from last season is on the boat’s crew. Suddenly Murphy is all like, “Oh wait, this cute girl that held the knife to me last season is in the boat. I guess I’ll drink the Koolaid after all.” Hell. I hate this so much. And sure enough, then ALIE pops up and says to Jaha, “Told you he’d come around.” Red alert. Likely terrible storyline straight ahead.

Now we’re back in the cantina where Gina and others sorting supplies from the Mountain. Shawn Mendes – a singer I had never heard of until promos of the show from this past week, but apparently he’s some teen sensation or something – wants to steal a trinket from their haul. Gina and Raven sell it to him literally for a song, which turns out to be a crappy, slow version of “Add It Up” played on a Mountain piano. At that speed, sung in its entirety, this rendition would take like ten minutes to sing. Please, God, do not let that version actually exist.

And herewith we get some signature Doctor/Mechanic interaction. Abby apparently understood where Raven was coming from with that burn from before, “You were right. I am spread too thin.” But Raven still refuses to have the operation. I’m not sure why, but I guess we’ll see. She asks, “Are you here as my chancellor or my doctor?” Abby says, “I’m here as your friend.” And in pure Raven sassy mode, we get, “Good, then shut up and drink.” And they do, and there seems to be some good friendship chemistry continuing with the two of them. I’m not altogether convinced on the Doctor/Mechanic ship potential, but there are a lot of fans out there who are, so there you go, some friendly but fraught fodder for your next May-December romance fanfic.

Lincoln and Octavia apparently have a nice room full of  non-Groundery things like an actual bed.  Lincoln tosses the Guard jacket and goes out to sleep on the ground with Octavia. He covers her sweetly with a blanket and lies down to spoon with her. She still looks sad. But sleeping under the stars is a very Octavia thing to want to do after having been cooped up under a floor and then having to rot in prison. It’s heartbreaking to see.

Clarke wakes up in bed with Niylah, apparently from a nightmare and in full panic mode. She looks around and sees Niylah and looks sad and slightly startled, or disappointed. Disappointed in herself? Disappointed that it’s not Lexa? Who knows? But she realizes she has to leave, or she’ll probably put this poor girl in danger, so she starts getting her clothes together. This scene is pretty heart-wrenching. You really see what Clarke has been going through. She probably hasn’t slept normally the whole time she’s been on her own, constantly awakened by images of the people she was responsible for killing.

Oh and the mournful, slow “Add It Up” cover is still playing through all this.

We see Murphy and Emori, et al, on the boat. Going where? Nowhere good I’m sure.

In the rover, we see Kane, Indra, Monty, and Bellamy. During the part of the song where it goes, “Don’t you shoot that thing at me” Indra glares at Kane’s gun with a helping of some signature Indra side-eye. Indra side-eye is one of the many reasons I love this show, incidentally.

Jasper comes into the cantina area, raving about the items from the Mountain. “These belonged to people. So did that piano.” Then he yells, “Bunch of grave robbers!” and jumps on Shawn Mendes, who stops playing this bad cover tune. Finally. Then, surprising us all, Shawn punches Jasper back. Maybe this dude can bring us something more than bad cover tunes of punk classics, after all.

The rover is blocked by a fallen tree. Indra says it’s been cut down. Bellamy goes, “You don’t know that.” WHUT? Bellamy, you dolt. Do. Not. Question. Indra’s. Tree. Knowledge. She is literally a general from the Tree clan. Another huge trunk falls behind the  rover so that it can no longer move. They’re clearly screwed. Serious Indra eye roll in response to Bellamy: “We do now.” Mega-burn.

Meanwhile, Clarke is leaving the trading post in the dark of night. She looks around and steels herself for another dangerous trek through the woods, and gets grabbed by creepy dude from before. “Hello Wanheda.” Shit.

This also means that he’s been out there waiting for her to finish having super thirsty grounder lady-sex with Niylah. And probably heard the whole thing because hello structures there definitely not soundproof. Eww.

Bonus Questions: Where the heck was our Commander? I mean her presence looms large in the background of this episode, but we didn’t get to see our favorite Heda Raccoon. I’m sad. Who knocked down the trees? And why does this f***ing ALIE storyline exist again?

Best Line: Clarke’s “Would you mind not talking?” I mean…

Best hair: Sorry but I could deal with Clarke’s Wanheda dye job for another episode or two.

Worst hair: Murphy’s wine-soaked dreds

Injured: Our girl Raven (still / ongoing), Clarke (panther, and psychological trauma), Jasper (dramatic manpain)

Death: Ice Nation dudes, and RIP Panther. And that poor bunny.

Queerness Quotient: Upped considerably in this episode. By like a million. Clarke, confirmed bi. Miller, probably gay. Monty, something? Monroe, totally lez. Harper: soon to be converted by Monroe. Niylah: Wanheda-sexual.

Recap Episode Index – Note, I’ll be adding Season 3 updates as the episodes air, but I’m also still working on my recaps of Seasons 1 and 2, so those will appear whenever I can write them up.